It has been a while....
and I am full. And when I speak of Full I am not intrinsically eluding to the belly. I am Full. Full of the experiences that life love and friendships offer. I am exhausted by the cliches of the world that I experience. I am fully encased in a tomb of consciousness that holds so heavy on my ever waking thoughts. the ability to look into the city lights at night provide seconds for my only seemingly organic refuge. Fully involved in the inner workings of my spiritual quest entitled LOVE. I have grown into a woman who craves Love immensely that I'm sometimes afraid of. Some are offended by my resistance to the religious sector of spiritual maturity..... My apologies I will offer when love fails me.
I want the courage to express my artistic coward.
I have a false sense of security.. confidence because until I have provided my community with the inter workings of Love I am lost. I am constantly lost.... my mind is crowded. I would never call myself a big dreamer, I'm a realist in most cases, my only relentless and guilty pleasures is that of romantized love. I believe we are all gods and at this time would like to pay homage to a god in my life that helps to encourage me, allows me to vent and be free. I no longer worry about the petty undesirable false treasures of this world because of this very basic and necessary human interaction.
my adventure of the day:
It was like the beginning of a race .... As I floated to consciousness, paced my heart to Black and control my breaths to calm interactions I struggled with my truths and ashamed of poor decisions. I crowded my mind with things that I can mandate to logic. this was all during a brisk mind tormenting experience around Barnes and Nobles today.I became FULL. I called my mentor for the answers and
yes he guided me in a nice direction but the path I'm seeking is still hidden. I have been capitalized in a term minimally understood
EMOTION.
Today is Jan 1, 2010
the pressures of the day begin
things I wanna do in 2010 --- become uniquely defined...sleep on the beach--- try to eat a whole banana ---go to mardi gras--- invent a sound and color called Happy... allow my art to be mine/d
